Every day I prayed for an answer: If this was the end then please help to erase her from my memory and if we were meant to be then please bring her to me. My feelings for her actually intensified tremendously. I felt closer to her and really needed her. Not the answer I wanted.
I had to attend a conference out-of-town and thought it would be a good time to get her out of my system once and for all. I would play up and have a ball and all this would be a distant memory at the end. Instead the feelings got stronger; incredibly strong.
I was also watching a lot of chick flicks, which is way out of character for me. I was amazed at the answers I found therein.
12th August 2011 – Neytiri – I’m listening to a lot of celine lately.
12th August 2011 – Jake – I know! I can feel it & it’s drivin me crazy. I can’t explain the intense feelins & pray for guidance. Do call when u get a break from riotin with ur mates.
As stated I was praying daily for answers and I got the below which confirmed our relationship, as I understood it. It was so true for us and appeared to be just for us. The timing was impeccable and uncanny.
15th August 2011 – Jake – Hey Dork..What follows is uncanny; from today’s DKTU! I know u don’t believe this shit but I feel compeled to share. Example of daily miracle I hav.
Uniting two halves of one soul is inevitable, but timing depends upon your level of spirituality. When the time is ripe, true soul mates find one another even if they are worlds apart – whether physically, on opposite sides of the globe, or spiritually, with contrasting lifestyles and backgrounds. Here’s wishing you the courage to keep growing so that you may know – or continue to know – the blessing of oneness.
That’s definitely gonna freak you out for a while! You can now go back into your hole.
I gave a public speech on my experience and finding my soul mate.
I had not heard from Neytiri at all and with my birthday coming up I told myself if I don’t hear from her, it will confirm it is over. However, my feelings for her were still intense and deep.
25th August 2011 – Neytiri – Sorry I missed your birthday yesterday.
25th August 2011 – Jake – Sorry!? No wishes; no pash; no amends? Very disappointingL..Ish’llah
My birthday came & went and I felt relieved I had not heard from her and that was my confirmation it was over. However, when I got the above SMS the next day, I was not annoyed she forgot but annoyed she actually remembered and that maybe it was not over. Bugger!
By now my life was amazing and I was experiencing daily miracles and learning to trust my intuition. Answers were coming from the words to the next song I heard; the information in the next article I read; the story line of the next movie I watched; the chance utterance of the next person I met!
I sent her the SMS below purely on intuition and at the time did not know why I felt compelled to send it.
27th August 2011 – Jake – Darkness covers u & I see your sadness. I pray for us. Let the light in..Ish’llah!
2nd September 2011 – Jake – Be happy when God answers your prayers, but be more thankful when God makes you the answer to someone else’s prayer!
There is a time for departure even when there’s no certain place to go.
I thought the school holidays were over and hence my last comment was a sort of goodbye.
Something strange happened to me over the weekend physiologically. I felt like a teenager and became horny as a toad! I mean I was getting aroused just looking at cleavage!
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