Saturday, 14 December 2013

The Dark Side

December 13: The Dark Side

Have you ever gone outside at night and looked closely at the new moon? Or looked through a telescope at the moon when it was crescent shaped? Although what we see is a bright slice, we know there’s more. Even when the moon is full and lights the night sky, there s a dark side to the moon.
 
There’s a dark side to us too. We all experience jealousy, envy bitterness, resentment. How about neediness? Ugh. Who wants to shine a light on that?
 
What about all those fears? Fear of failure, fear of Success, fear of intimacy, fear of going broke, fear of staying broke, fear of abandonment, fear that we’re essentially unlovable, fear of the unknown, fear of growing old, fear of being alone, fear of being with someone, fear of losing control.
 
Then there are other parts of us that we would prefer to keep darkened and out of sight, parts such as greed, dishonesty, intolerance, disgust, hatred. Although some people have no problem showing anger, others of us prefer to keep that out of sight too. And what about our manipulative part? Who wants anyone to see that?
 
Some of us may even consider the dark side of ourselves forbidden. We may refuse to acknowledge it exists because we believe it’s wrong. Not acknowledging our dark side doesn’t wish it out of existence, any more than not seeing the dark side of the moon makes it disappear.

Most sane people agree that they don’t want to be controlled by their dark side. We don’t want parts of ours elves- jealousy, neediness, greed to control our behaviors. But when we don’t acknowledge these emotions and traits, they can gain control. The more we try to repress something, the more it fights for its life.

 
Stand back. Don’t be afraid. Shine a light on that dark part. At least look at it briefly. Acknowledge it’s there. Take some of the pressure off. Let yourself be well rounded, instead of one dimensional.
 
Take it a step further. Share those darker parts with others, so they can shine a light on those parts of themselves. Experience how much easier it is not to act needy, not to speak bitterly, and not to look disgusted when you acknowledge those feelings.
 
Value: We don ‘t just have a light side, a bright side. Nobody is always loving, always kind, always generous, always thoughtful. We should honestly acknowledge our character defects as well.

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