REFLECTION FOR TODAY: What is it that brings on an emotional slip? How and why does it happen? These questions have answers only I can supply, but it helps if I write down the persons, places and things or events in connection with each peevish or painful state. The "touchy spots" or thoughts which seem to come before or during such times can give me a clue as to what my Higher Power would have me do. My last call to reach out? When did I last read some solid literature? In my writings or journal, have I noted those things which successfully pulled me out of a negative emotional state? What worked for me then? Sometimes a simple thing comes to mind, a tool given us in the program such as HALT, the 4 elements which frequently bring on bad emotional states: Hunger, Anger, Loneliness and Tiredness.
Thank you for these simople effective tools.
I will steer clear of HALT and consider what effect they have had in my life so far.
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Beyond Reacting
by Madisyn Taylor
We have all had the experience of reacting in a way that was less than ideal upon hearing bad news, or being unfairly criticized, or being told something we did not want to hear. This makes sense because when our emotions are triggered, they tend to take center stage, inhibiting our ability to pause before we speak. We may feel compelled to release the tension by expressing ourselves in some way, whether it’s yelling back at the person yelling at us, or rushing to deliver words of comfort to a friend in trouble. However, there is much to be said for teaching ourselves to remember to pause and take a deep breath before we respond to the shocks and insults that can come our way in life.
For one thing, our initial response is not always what’s best for us, or for the other people involved. Reacting to childish rage with childish rage will only escalate the negativity in a situation, further ensnaring us in an undesirable dynamic. Similarly, when we react defensively, or simply thoughtlessly, we often end up feeling regret over our words or actions. In the end, we save ourselves a lot of pain when we take a deep breath and really tune in to ourselves, and the other person, before we respond. This doesn’t necessarily mean we don’t say anything, although in some cases, that may be the best option.
Some situations require a fairly immediate response, but even just a moment of grounding ourselves before we do so can help enormously. The next time you find yourself wanting to react, try to pause, and in that pause, take a deep breath. Feel your feet on the floor, the air on your skin, and listen for a response to arise within you, rather than just going with the first thing that pops into your head. You may find that in that moment, there is the potential to move beyond reaction and into the more subtle and creative realm of response, where something new can happen.
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