The Power of Union

2^nd May 2012 – Neytiri – What are you doing now. I need to talk

I have just had one of my most troubling nights in recent times.

Last night I received the above SMS.  I did not hear the phone.  I went to my home office to do my work and somehow I was drawn to the phone.  I was not expecting a SMS from Neytiri so I don’t normally check my phone.  It was meant to be!

As I called her I felt a sense of anxiety from nowhere.  I thought to myself; what’s happening,  I thought I was over this.  Neytiri answers and the first words out of her mouth is that she is really anxious!  That figures.

She had read the blog and wanted to know what I meant by “our destiny”; “my life is on pause”; “live the dream”, etc.

I told her one of my “requests” is that we are one at a physical, emotional and spiritual level. I said I don’t know when it will happen; next week, next year, next life, but I know it will manifest. She said as far as she is concerned we are already one! In the next sentence she said she cannot let go of her current life so it is impossible to manifest my request in this life.

She said she is not ready to detach from her children. She is not ready to die! Fair enough.

She eventually found her peace and her anxiety dissipated.  I asked her if you now knew what she wants? She replied "Same as you; to find myself with you, as one!" Very special and touching.

She looked absolutely glowing and I told her this a few times.  I could feel her inner joy and peace. This was to be short lived.

When she said she needed to talk, I thought she was going to ask me about making amends.  Anyway the talk eventually shifted to this and we explored further her exploits during her 8 month binge.

I find it amazing how the ego (or is it the co-dependent trait?) can trivialise; minimise and rationalise an event or issue to make it acceptable so as to cover the shame and protect the ego and pain-body.

This was the discovery on the night.  The event itself is neutral, it does not care.  It is the cause and effect that are more important.  I think Neytiri realised the magnitude and enormity of her actions on an innocent 3^rd party. She said she felt deeply humiliated and had intense anxiety in the pit of her stomach.  We probably peeled an inch off the onion. We had to end the chat at this critical stage.

I did my mediation and went to bed.  However, I had a restless time and at about 3am had this intense feeling of anxiety / fear in my stomach from nowhere!  Was I feeling her pain? I prayed and prayed but seemed to get nowhere.  I eventually drifted to a light sleep and then was up early. The anxiety has reduced significantly but is still present as I write this blog.

I think I may have pushed her too hard.  It took a lot of courage for her to tell me what she did but I think at too high a price.  My prayer is that she is aware enough not to repeat her actions (Step 10) and I am confident she will be.

3^rd May 2012 – Jake – Would you believe me if I tell you that I love you so much? Actually, I’d prefer it if you won’t. Why? So that I can spend the rest of my life proving to you how much I do..Ish’llah

Entering into Partnership

The purpose of partnership is to create something greater than we can create alone. Not because of any deficiency or incompleteness in us, but because each of us is unique, with our own talents and abilities, and in partnership we increase the efforts and talents available for creating something meaningful together. All partnerships, whether romantic, creative, or professionally-based, can be powerful relationships for personal growth. In partnership we harness the power of union.

It is important to choose our partnerships consciously. Sometimes forged quickly during times of need, we may find ourselves rushing into unions with perhaps not the clearest intentions. Partnerships created from those starting point might serve our immediate needs, but the repercussions of a union so quickly fostered without much thought can be difficult to recover from. Granted, there is something to learn from every relationship, but looking to another to fix or complete us can turn a partnership into a dependent bond. If we can stay clear about what we want and what we need in a partnership, while staying grounded and remembering that we are our own source of happiness and fulfillment, we can create partnerships that support and enhance the best of who we are.

Everyone in our lives is a mirror reflecting back the parts we love and dislike about ourselves. If we have the courage to recognize our reflections in each other, we can grow through our partnerships. A partnership that offers both acceptance of who we are and an opportunity for personal transformation can be fertile ground for growing a healthy, lasting union. When we find this kind of partnership, we are more likely to want to keep it, invest in it, and nurture it.
Life is a collaborative effort. Much of what we do can be enhanced through partnership. Together we are stronger because our personal power is multiplied by two. Through partnership we experience the joys of working, living, and loving together.

For more information visit dailyom.com

In partnership and relationship we harness the power of union.